In Fairfax County Public Schools, students in elementary and middle school play or compete according to their gender identity. In high schools, for informal or intra-mural competitions (e.g. PowderPuff, Latin Olympics), they also compete according to their gender identity.
For non-school-sponsored sports such as crew, rugby, travel soccer and so forth, students follow the requirements of the governing body of their sport.
Official school-sponsored sports (and debate) come under the Virginia High School League, will allows transgender students to compete after much gate-keeping and hoop-jumping. But there are a number of students in the county who have jumped through the hoops and are competing.
Trans students essentially must “out” themselves to their Director of Students Activities and principal to go through the appeals process. DSAs in the high schools go through training and should be able to help and guide families or students through the process.
Here is the link to the VHSL page on “transgender appeals.” If a trans student wants to compete in a varsity sport, the best course of action may be to contact the principal and the Director of Student Activities; they should be knowledgeable about navigating the process. https://documentcloud.adobe.com/link/review?uri=urn:aaid:scds:US:a9cdb656-1091-4b1b-9640-16c829ab7be3#pageNum=1